Sorry moms, but Mother's Day sucks

I’m not looking forward to Mother’s Day this year.

Last year, I remember going to Hidden Lake on Saturday to celebrate with mom. It was beautiful, sunny. The next day, Mother’s Day, I took a home pregnancy test and discovered I was finally pregnant after 5 months of trying! The next day that line was much darker and soon after all the symptoms kicked in. I was so happy to feel so gross!

Three days after our 1st anniversary in June, I found out we were loosing the baby. My body didn’t reject it (no wonder) so after 4 more weeks, I finally elected to have a D&C. Two weeks after that, my sister-in-law announced she was pregnant with #4. It was my husband’s birthday and my body still hadn’t healed when I heard the news. It took a total of 78 days to stop bleeding, 104 before I had a natural period and could start trying to conceive again. It hurts to know we're the same age - she's on #4 and I'm 0 for 2.

In January, the month I would have been due, I had another loss; a chemical pregnancy.

Mother’s Day is currently ruined for me. We’re the only couple without a child in both sides of the family… I don’t want to celebrate with others… I just want to mourn our loss and try to get out of bed and function again the next day.